last night

how i felt last night, have been feeling. . . my heart pulled in many directions, my mind stretched and reaching for many ideas. it's not a bad feeling, but it gets lonely, i feel.

displacement
these days,
the sky is not the same.
and still. i am.
they say-home is where the heart is.
and still. mine is unfettered, unbound.
undone.
and home feels a million places away.
these ears are accustomed to the silence of snow,
these eyes begin with solid. black. earth.
everyday, in every way,
i miss it. you. them.
and still. i do not.
to be torn between lives,
push-pulled and buffeted
by sea,
the wind,
the sun-
this language of nature i recognize,
but whose dialect is not the same.
these days, the green i knew and the green i see are not the same.
and still. my heart is.
i could explain all of this to you,
give it word. and depth.
and still. it isn't the same.
to be tugged, at war with your heart,
your word,
your language.
please understand- i already felt displaced,
got homesick at home.
so. if my eyes look bruised today,
please settle the loving language of stars down around these shoulders
and embrace the weary heart
who has not yet found a home.